I haven't been updating much on my blog these days which kinda sucks but anyway I felt like talking a bit. These days I've finally been focusing on animation for reals and let me tell you it feels awesome! I've always wanted to get back to it and actually learning how it works and what makes an animation tick...it's so cool to understand how it all comes together to make a really cool piece of animation..something that moves as if it lives and breathes...it's truly incredible seeing a bunch of pencil lines or polygons moving as if they're alive, but that's the power of animation. Right now there's all this pressure for me to start studying in university here and it's all the more annoying because I want to study animation and none of the universities even have it as a subject let alone be specialized in it. But I AM studying animation on my own and also with help from my big bro who's like an amaaaazing animator and also my mentor. But my folks don't really get the fact that you don't really need a certificate to work anywhere in this industry. It's really your portfolio that counts.....worst part is they still don't think I'm serious about CG and animation. They think it's a phase.... WTF! How can something you've loved all your frickin goddamn life be some phase huh?? Geez people....and I'm going to try for Gobelins next year so starting uni here would not only be a waste of money but also a waste of time. I need all the time I can get to hone my animation and drawing skills before applying there...not to mention learn French.
I've tried explaining this to my folks to no avail. My mum just goes nuts at the very idea of me trying to convince her about all this and they don't ever want to listen to me or hear me through. It's so one sided...pretty lame really. And it's not like I'm sitting around, I'm working at the best animation studio in the country, and I think should atleast speak to them about how serious I'm about all this. Sure animation is quite young in my country but it's growing everyday, and along with growing demand the industry grows too. If I weren't working at Ogniroth, I probably would've gone nuts a long time ago...I learn so much there everyday....it's incredible! Seriously like some awesome artist once said it's better to be the worst artist in an awesome studio, than be the best in a lame one....cause the amount of stuff you learn from everyone and the experience you gain is invaluable. Seriously, if you can't afford to study CG or animation in an institution, then well I'd definitely recommend learning from your job. Even if you start working at a small animation/game studio, it'll be a really good learning experience, provided especially that you keep pushing yourself to be the best that you can be... But going to animation school shouldn't be something you want to miss, even if only to meet up with other like minded people and make contacts because that is really important. You could probably do cool projects together with the friends you make there....
Anyway, so where was I....right so there's a lot of pressure from my folks about this uni thing, and me trying to pursue this hasn't been easy. But being under the delusion of following someone else's dream the last couple of years barely gave me any time to pursue the things I love and am passionate about. Which left me feeling incredibly empty, uninspired and just incredibly lame for a good bit of time now. Sure pursuing animation isn't being easy but you know I'd rather fight trying to pursue what I love than sit around and feel lame about pursuing something that's being forced on me. It's really weird when people say oh hey we're supportive of what you're doing but you HAVE to go study some other degree at uni and get amazing grades while you're at it. WOW. As if amazing animation skills are going to fall from the sky and grace me or sth....geeez. It's like tying you up and saying oh hey you can run, didn't say you can't. Pfft.
So home has become kinda weird for more than a year now. Whenever I'm home I'm constantly reminded how other kids from my class are already in uni and doing great and I'm still "sitting around". Obviously working doesn't count as anything. And well they're forcing me to sit for this admission test into this uni. So laaame. But who cares, I'm focusing on my short film and learning basic animation principles and experimenting with random animations...and it's been awesome doing that! There was a time when I'd make random animations on a regular basis and plan on making all these short films and right now doing that again, sure brings back fond memories man...and it's a really awesome feeling, it makes you feel like a kid again...well I'm a kid anyway..but still you get me right.. It sorta nullifies all the negativity around you and fills you with positive energy. It's the best feeling in the world! So even if there's a lotta negativity from certain people, this surge of positive energy is really motivating. Not to mention the support from my awesome friends and siblings, it's really inspiring. I used to have some difficulty animating in fronta everyone but recently I'm getting more and more used to it....because of these animation jams we've been doing at work. Anyway what I wanted to say was that I'm really glad to be pursuing animation for reals again and all I had to do was break out of my negative thoughts and worries about not being good at it, to actually just do it! No one's good at anything from the start...everyone starts somewhere... I mean it's kinda tough to actually start doing something when you keep thinking that you're bad at it and maybe one day you'll get better at it so then you can do it. Well if you never even do it then that one day will never come and you'll always be stuck there. It's like the worst place to get stidk at. It's like my big bro says, if you don't pursue your interests then that's all they'll ever be...just interests. SO I'm glad I got started with animation again after so ling. I got a long longggg way to go but hey I'll do my best and keep at it.
So I'm going to work super hard for reals and be a better artist and finish my short! I'm hoping to get it done by mid August. I'll do my best, won't let you guys down!! Like srsly! XD
And to anyone who's struggling with trying to pursue what they love....just hang in there and keep working hard! Never ever stop believing, hoping or dreaming. And never stop loving. And always remember to have fun! Because isn't that where it all began?
Hail positivity!
Moony,
Peace out
